Monday, April 5, 2010

I'm no slave to fashion, but........









Seriously, why do some of the most hideous things become fashion trends? Hey ladies, here is some free advice for you: Unless you are a size 2, those skinny jeans make YOUR ASS LOOK FAT!!!! Also, even though they are "hip" right now, they really are just one stop away from the dreaded "mom jeans." And men, if you are sporting jeans that look like you may have snatched out of one of the Jonas Brothers' closets, you pretty much look like you may have spent some time in the closet yourself.

Now on to the glamorous platform stilettos like the Louboutins J.Lo and Posh like to stomp around in. Guess what they aren't so new, they've been around a long time and at one time you could only find them in very select shops. Yep, they are a less tacky version (though only slightly less) than the lucite stripper shoes you could only purchase in XXX shops. Now don't you feel so modern and sophisticated you went from boardroom meeting ending to backroom happy ending.

Now on to the appropriately named Ugg boots. Unfortunately and surprisingly these babies have had staying power. I don't care how comfortable they are, they look horrible. Not only do they look like awful on the outside, I can only imagine the lovely aroma that would greet you on the inside. Please take notes, you are allowed to wear horrible functional shoes when needed, say when walking in two feet of snow in 20 degree temperatures. However, there is never a need to slip on sheepskin boots when you are walking around in shorts and it's 70 degrees outside. Then again, no one would actually wear these boots in the weather they are designed for because they cost $200 + a pair. So let's all make a deal and put these to rest with leisure suits and scrunchies.

Ok, so the vest thing is just up there for fun. I really don't think they are that bad. I personally don't wear them, but hey I had to put four options on the poll. Speaking of, please let your opinion be known on these trends and vote on the poll.